better late than never

Yesterday was the DUE DATE, and knowing that there was no baby coming, I was too depressed to write. Today I am also depressed but feel like I should write something, at the very least: "No baby yet!"

Early in my pregnancy, I thought that I would definitely avoid that ridiculous phenomenon that I hear all pregnant women experience, whereby the due date comes and goes and the woman sinks into a pre-partum depression that paralyzes her (and probably the baby too), and turns her into a griping, hot, oversized wanker. I remember thinking, "That's so ridiculous, it's just an approximation, it doesn't really mean anything. The baby will come when it's ready." Ha.

Apparently this is like thinking that you are one of those people who can just try heroin once or twice without becoming addicted. It's an almost incapacitating amount of denial, folks. No! That won't happen to me! I'll be patient and excited whether my baby is born early or late, yadda yadda. Hilarious.

Let me look on the bright side... They paved the street today, which means there will actually be a street there for the birth team to use. And because the baby hasn't arrived yet, Sean and I had time to buy enough groceries for a small army of birthing professionals! Sean is really understanding about what a crappy mood I'm in and is doing everything possible to make life easier, including housekeeping, chores, errands, etc. We're watching tons of bad movies and taking daily walks. And I'm not at work! So life really is great, I'm just being a poophead.

So my second giant complaint for today (can't be positive for too long) -- the dog has fleas. There is only one way to kill fleas, and that is with the incredibly effective toxic flea serum. But I am completely unwilling to use the incredibly effective toxic flea serum, knowing that there will soon (or maybe not so soon) be a tiny infant in the house who will be getting licked by the dog's tongue, which will be full of the incredibly effective toxic flea serum; who will be getting caressed by the parents who have touched the dog's fur which has been soaked from the inside out in the incredibly effective toxic flea serum, etc. Argh! I was so careful during my whole pregnancy to stay away from weird toxic smells and foods and things, and now here I am, breathing gulp after gulp of new pavement fumes and contemplating spreading toxic pesticides all over the house.

I guess the baby will be born with two heads after all.